Love Doesn't Come Cheap
[over the answering machine]
Hi, Kat, this is Nick Mercer.
Sorry I didn't get back to you last night but I got your messages, all 7 of them.
I know you're nervous, Kat, but this is what I get paid for.
I'm running late so I sent a messenger to pick up my ticket.
Kat, stop worrying.
Your ex-fiance will sorry for left you and your family will think we're in love.
Trust me, I'll see you at the airport.
Can't wait to meet you.
~Nick Mercer
Oh, I should warn you.
You know those families where everyone's out of their mind
but they're your family so you love them?
[Nick nods]
Mine's not like that.
~Kat Ellis
Nick: Do me a favor, quit apologizing.
If you look at this as a business transaction, maybe you won't feel compelled to keep saying sorry.
Kat: I'm sorry.
Nick: It's also really annoying.
Weddings are a celebration of love and commitment in Utopia.
In the real world they're an excuse to drink excessively and say things you shouldn't.
~Nick Mercer
Kat, reading the article: You say, and I quote,
"Every woman has the exact love life she wants."
That seems a broad generalization...
Do you honestly believe that I want to be single and miserable?
Do you think that I want to be hung up on some guy who led me on for years and out of the blue shattered my heart?
Nick: First of all, there's no such thing as out of the blue.
And second of all, yeah.
Kat: What?
Nick: When you ready to let go to be un-single and un-miserable, you will.
Kat: Have you ever done a wedding before?
Nick: No, but I have done funerals.
Kat: An escort at a funeral? [chuckles] Someone's dead.
Nick: Yeah, imagine facing that alone.
It's not about the sex.
It's about understanding what people need.
It's not about me.
It's about you.
~Nick Mercer
Nick: You're safe, you can relax.
He's gonna be so sorry he lost you.
So, stop worrying.
Forget the past.
Forget the pain.
And remember, what an incredible woman you are.
If you do that, he'll realize what he lost.
Kat: Holy crap! You're worth every penny.
Nick: Here's to the husbands who've won you, the losers who've lost you,
and the lucky bastards who've yet to met you.
Amy: And to the cock in the henhouse.
Nick: When I told you I'd never done a wedding before, it wasn't because I'd never been asked.
I'd just never said yes.
Kat: Why'd you say yes to me?
Nick: There was something in your voice on the phone that day.
Kat: Desperation?
Nick: I think it was hope.
Kat: I've been spilling my guts all weekend and I don't know anything about you.
Nick: I'm allergic to fabric softener.
I'm majoring in comparative literature at Brown.
I hate anchovies.
I think I'd miss you even if we'd never met.
Nick: This may not make much sense to you, sir,
but I'd like to ask your permission to date your daughter.
Dad: I thought you already were.
Kat: I should probably admit that I brought Nick with me to torture you, slowly, for the entire weekend.
But then, I don't know, something happened and now,
I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings, but I'm just sick of you and me,
of our whole story...
so come on, let's just go upstairs and eat some tiramisu.
Jeffrey: I slept with your sister.
Kat: I'm sorry?
Jeffrey: Well, I shagged Amy, 2 years ago, that's why I broke it off with you.
And then after you left, sod it, we kept at it like rabbits,
until we both realized it was absolutely mad and, obviously, morally wrong.
And then that was it.
But last Christmas, when Ed proposed, I realized, I'm in love with her.
Kat: How could you not have told me?
Nick: What did you expect me to say?
Kat: You let me make a fool of myself.
You lied to me, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised because that's what you do,
that's who you are, you're a liar.
Nick: You're judging me? That's a good one.
You stand there and point a finger at me, the guy that you hired to pretend to be your boyfriend.
Kat: You're right. I was so desperate to make everyone believe that I was happy,
that I paid $6000 for a lie.
And, at the end of the day, the only one who ended up falling for it was me.
I wish I could say it was worth it.
Nick: Go ahead, Kat, hate me.
I think you're running out of steam on this whole Jeffrey thing anyhow.
It maybe now you'll be able to hold on to this long enough to ruin your next relationship.
Dad: So, why did you let him go?
Kat: It's complicated, Dad.
Dad: Right. It probably wouldn't have worked out anyway, huh?
I remember reading a fascinating article in the New York Times Magazine once,
where this guy said, "Every woman has the exact love life she wants."
You know what? I agree with him.
But I refuse to believe that this is what you want, Kat.
Ever since you were little, you've always worried about what other people think.
Now, come on. What do you think? Is he the guy for you?
[Kat nods]
Then go and get him.
The hardest thing's loving someone and then having the courage to let them love you back.
But if you know her shit and she knows yours
and at the end of the day, you still would rather give up than try,
nothing's ever gonna be worth it.
~Nick Mercer
*****
[over the answering machine]
Hi, Kat, this is Nick Mercer.
Sorry I didn't get back to you last night but I got your messages, all 7 of them.
I know you're nervous, Kat, but this is what I get paid for.
I'm running late so I sent a messenger to pick up my ticket.
Kat, stop worrying.
Your ex-fiance will sorry for left you and your family will think we're in love.
Trust me, I'll see you at the airport.
Can't wait to meet you.
~Nick Mercer
Oh, I should warn you.
You know those families where everyone's out of their mind
but they're your family so you love them?
[Nick nods]
Mine's not like that.
~Kat Ellis
Nick: Do me a favor, quit apologizing.
If you look at this as a business transaction, maybe you won't feel compelled to keep saying sorry.
Kat: I'm sorry.
Nick: It's also really annoying.
Weddings are a celebration of love and commitment in Utopia.
In the real world they're an excuse to drink excessively and say things you shouldn't.
~Nick Mercer
Kat, reading the article: You say, and I quote,
"Every woman has the exact love life she wants."
That seems a broad generalization...
Do you honestly believe that I want to be single and miserable?
Do you think that I want to be hung up on some guy who led me on for years and out of the blue shattered my heart?
Nick: First of all, there's no such thing as out of the blue.
And second of all, yeah.
Kat: What?
Nick: When you ready to let go to be un-single and un-miserable, you will.
Kat: Have you ever done a wedding before?
Nick: No, but I have done funerals.
Kat: An escort at a funeral? [chuckles] Someone's dead.
Nick: Yeah, imagine facing that alone.
It's not about the sex.
It's about understanding what people need.
It's not about me.
It's about you.
~Nick Mercer
Nick: You're safe, you can relax.
He's gonna be so sorry he lost you.
So, stop worrying.
Forget the past.
Forget the pain.
And remember, what an incredible woman you are.
If you do that, he'll realize what he lost.
Kat: Holy crap! You're worth every penny.
Nick: Here's to the husbands who've won you, the losers who've lost you,
and the lucky bastards who've yet to met you.
Amy: And to the cock in the henhouse.
Nick: When I told you I'd never done a wedding before, it wasn't because I'd never been asked.
I'd just never said yes.
Kat: Why'd you say yes to me?
Nick: There was something in your voice on the phone that day.
Kat: Desperation?
Nick: I think it was hope.
Kat: I've been spilling my guts all weekend and I don't know anything about you.
Nick: I'm allergic to fabric softener.
I'm majoring in comparative literature at Brown.
I hate anchovies.
I think I'd miss you even if we'd never met.
Nick: This may not make much sense to you, sir,
but I'd like to ask your permission to date your daughter.
Dad: I thought you already were.
Kat: I should probably admit that I brought Nick with me to torture you, slowly, for the entire weekend.
But then, I don't know, something happened and now,
I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings, but I'm just sick of you and me,
of our whole story...
so come on, let's just go upstairs and eat some tiramisu.
Jeffrey: I slept with your sister.
Kat: I'm sorry?
Jeffrey: Well, I shagged Amy, 2 years ago, that's why I broke it off with you.
And then after you left, sod it, we kept at it like rabbits,
until we both realized it was absolutely mad and, obviously, morally wrong.
And then that was it.
But last Christmas, when Ed proposed, I realized, I'm in love with her.
Kat: How could you not have told me?
Nick: What did you expect me to say?
Kat: You let me make a fool of myself.
You lied to me, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised because that's what you do,
that's who you are, you're a liar.
Nick: You're judging me? That's a good one.
You stand there and point a finger at me, the guy that you hired to pretend to be your boyfriend.
Kat: You're right. I was so desperate to make everyone believe that I was happy,
that I paid $6000 for a lie.
And, at the end of the day, the only one who ended up falling for it was me.
I wish I could say it was worth it.
Nick: Go ahead, Kat, hate me.
I think you're running out of steam on this whole Jeffrey thing anyhow.
It maybe now you'll be able to hold on to this long enough to ruin your next relationship.
Dad: So, why did you let him go?
Kat: It's complicated, Dad.
Dad: Right. It probably wouldn't have worked out anyway, huh?
I remember reading a fascinating article in the New York Times Magazine once,
where this guy said, "Every woman has the exact love life she wants."
You know what? I agree with him.
But I refuse to believe that this is what you want, Kat.
Ever since you were little, you've always worried about what other people think.
Now, come on. What do you think? Is he the guy for you?
[Kat nods]
Then go and get him.
The hardest thing's loving someone and then having the courage to let them love you back.
But if you know her shit and she knows yours
and at the end of the day, you still would rather give up than try,
nothing's ever gonna be worth it.
~Nick Mercer
*****
