All Women Keep Score...
Only The Great Ones Put It In Writing
It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay, another falls spectacularly to pieces
[Bridget]
Resolution #1: Uggg - will obviously lose 20 lbs.
#2: Always put last
night's panties in the laundry basket.
Equally important: will find nice
sensible boyfriend and stop forming romantic attachments to any of the
following: alcoholics, workaholics, sexaholics, commitment-phobics,
peeping toms, megalomaniacs, emotional fuckwits, or perverts.
Will
especially stop fantasizing about a particular person who embodies all
these things.
[Bridget]
I've been going crazy.
I can't stop thinking about you, and thinking about what an idiot I've been.
Christ, is that blue soup?
I can't stop thinking about you, and thinking about what an idiot I've been.
Christ, is that blue soup?
[Daniel Cleaver]
[Daniel Cleaver]: First, have some more wine, and then tell me the story about practicing
French kissing with the art girls at school, because it's a very good
story.
[Bridget]: It wasn't French kissing.
[Daniel Cleaver]: Don't care, make it up. That's an order, Jones.
[Daniel Cleaver]: Come on Bridget, we belong together - you, me, poor little skirt.
If I can't make it with you then I can't make it with anyone.
[Bridget]: That's not a good enough offer for me.
[Mark Darcy]: All right Cleaver, outside.
[Daniel Cleaver, half laughing]: I'm sorry? Outside?
Should I bring my dueling pistols or my sword?
[Mark Darcy]: I like you, very much.
[Bridget]: Ah, apart from the smoking and the drinking, the vulgar mother and... ah, the verbal diarrhea.
[Mark Darcy]: No, I like you very much. Just as you are.
[Bridget]: I owe you an apology about Daniel.
He said you ran off with his fiancée and left him brokenhearted.
[Mark Darcy]: No, it was the other way around. My wife. My heart.
[Bridget]: I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it.
Well, I meant it, but I was so stupid
that I didn't mean what I meant...
After all, it's only a diary.
Everyone knows diaries are just... full of crap.
[Mark Darcy]: Yes, I know that. I was just buying you a new one.
[Mark Darcy]: Bridget!
[Bridget]: Mark... What are you doing here?
[Mark Darcy]: I was just wondering if you were available for Bar Mitzvahs and Christenings in addition to Ruby Weddings.
[Bridget]: I thought you were in America.
[Mark Darcy]: Well I was... but I realized I had forgotten something here.
[Bridget]: Which was...?
[Mark Darcy]: Well, I realized that I had forgotten to... kiss you goodbye, do you mind?
[Bridget]: Umm... not really, no. So... does this mean you're 'not' going to America?
[Mark Darcy]: No... not.
[Bridget]: Does this mean you're staying here?
[Mark Darcy]: It would seem so...
*****
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