AMERICA'S SWEETHEART [2001]

Being America's Sweethearts Isn't Always Easy

Everyone hates me, everyone wants a piece of me. 

My therapist is out of the country, I wasn't nominated for a Golden Globe this year! 

Leave me alone! 

[Gwen]

[Kiki]: You really need to go to this junket. 

[Gwen, shakes her head]: No. 

[Kiki]: Why not? 

[Gwen]: I'm afraid. 

[Kiki]: Of...? 

[Gwen]: That I'll see Eddie and he'll be this destroyed, pathetic mess and I'll feel guilty. 

And I'm tired of feeling guilty, Kiki, I really am. 

[Kiki]: I know. 

[Gwen]: I'm always thinking about other people. 

[Kiki]: I know you are. 

[Gwen]: It's awful when you're the only person who cares about other people's feelings. 

If they see Eddie and he's down and depressed, they're going to pity him and blame me. 

[Kiki]: So, what you're really worried about is you. 

[Gwen]: Of course. 

[Kiki]: You know what this is? This is high school all over again. Nothing has changed. 

You wanted to break up with one of your boyfriends in high school, did you do it? 

No! You made me do it. 

[Gwen]: I did not! 

[Kiki]: Oh, please! Let's just refresh your memory. Robert Mancuta?

[Gwen]: Eww! 

[Kiki]: Kyle Hassler? 

[Gwen]: Oh, God... 

[Kiki]: Toby Franks? Half the lacrosse team? Ring a bell? Huh? 

By the end of the year, I was the most hated girl in school.

[Gwen]: That's not true. 

[Kiki]: My quote in the yearbook was, 'Hey, we have to talk.' I was despised. 

[Gwen]: You love me. 

[Eddie]: Yes, I do. I do love you. 

I love that beautiful, bright, sexy woman up on the screen... 

[Gwen, to the crowd]: See? He loves me. 

[Eddie]: Yeah, the girl I used to make movies with. 

But that's not the real you. 

That's you pretending to be real, which you're really good at. 

So when I'm with you in real life, I think I'm going to be with the real you, but I'm not. 

I'm with the real you that's with me right now, not the real you from the movies, 
and I don't want to be with... 'you'. 

[Eddie]: That's a nice necklace. 

[Kiki]: It's not really mine.

[Eddie]: I know. 

[Kiki]: It's Gwen's. 

[Eddie]: I know. 

[Kiki]: She gave it to me. 

[Eddie]: And I gave it to her.

[Kiki]: I know.

[Eddie]: Kiki! Kiki! Hold on, hold on. I want to talk. Look... 

[Kiki]: Let go of me! 

[Eddie]: Just... I want to talk! 

[Kiki]: I don't want to talk to you! 

[Eddie]: Why not? 

[Kiki]: Because you're an idiot! 

[Eddie]: Well? 

[Kiki]: You know what? For that matter, I'm an idiot, too! 
In that respect, we're actually quite perfect for each other.

[Eddie]: This is a very complicated situation... 

[Kiki]: Well, let me uncomplicate it for you, huh? 
Forget about what happened between us, Eddie. It's not going to work, all right? 
I mean, last night... last night was great. 
But then she calls you this morning and you just cannot wait to get out the door to get to her! 
What is that? 
It's just not going to work, 'cause you will probably always be thinking about her, 
and I will probably always be wondering if you were thinking about her. 
I just... I just need you to know one thing. 

[Eddie]: What? 

[Kiki]: That woman that you saw by the pool the other night... 

[Eddie]: Yeah... 

[Kiki]: No, that woman that you just have to spend the rest of your life with...
That was me. 

[Eddie]: I am grateful for you. In all the world, thing I am most grateful for is you. 

[Kiki]: If that's a line from one of your movies... 

[Eddie]: No, that one's mine. 

[Kiki, after got kiss from Eddie]: What was that? 

[Eddie]: Another stupid thing. 

[Eddie]: I blew it. I lost her. 

[Lee]: Guy goes to his rabbi. 
He says, 'I think my wife's trying to poison me.' 
Rabbi says, 'Let me talk to her.' 
Comes back a little later and says, 
'Listen, I spoke to your wife for three hours. Take the poison.' 
You get it? 
You and Gwen are over. 

[Eddie]: I don't care about Gwen! I'm talking about Kiki. 

*****