Santa Claus Is Coming To Town
[Principal Carol Newman]: Well, maybe if you spent more time with your son,
there would be fewer problems.
[Scott Calvin]: Maybe, but then I wouldn't get to spend more time with you.
It's always such a pleasure.
[Principal Carol Newman]: Oh, a battle of wits. It's a shame that you come unarmed.
[Lucy]: Uncle Scott, are you Santa Claus?
[Scott Calvin]: What makes you say that?
[Lucy]: Because you have a reindeer.
[Scott Calvin]: Lots of people have reindeer.
[Lucy]: Name five.
[Lucy]: Are you an elf?
[Curtis, the Experimental Elf]: Why, no, of course not.
[Lucy]: Then why do you have pointy ears?
[Curtis, the Experimental Elf]: Because I didn't eat my green vegetables.
Do you eat your green vegetables?
[Lucy, covers her ears]: Uncle Scott!
[Scott Calvin]: Hey Cupid, why don't you shoot me with one of your darts
and then I'll fall in love?
[Cupid]: First of all, they're not darts, they're arrows. Second of all, no can do.
[Scott Calvin]: Why not?
[Cupid]: Because they have no effect on us.
Believe me, if they did,
I would've
shot myself in the butt, met a nice girl, left business years ago.
*****
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